Mosquito
by zeurin
Summary: Leah is afraid of mosquitos. Jacob doesn't know why and tries to understand Leah better when she breaks down in contemplation of life and death. Oneshot.


This is the first story I've written from Jacob's POV, so I'm sorry if it's a little rough...

Anyways, I know I'm supposed to be working on A Healing Process, but this just bit me in the middle of the night and I seriously rolled out of bed to type this up... O.o The things I do for ya'all... -shakes head- Anywhoo, enjoy! ;)

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Leah stared at it, her entire body stiff. She looked as though she was ready to sprint away at any given second. I wanted to laugh at her, but my fondness of all four of my limbs kept me from doing so. Instead, I raised an eyebrow at her, "Don't be such a wimpy _girl_. Leah, it's just a mosquito."

We sat in her kitchen eating generous helpings of the pot pie Sue made for her and Seth while she was at Charlie's when Leah swatted at an insect which promptly fell out of the air, dead, near her elbow. Now she stared at it like it died just to spite her.

"I know," she quietly said, her eyes still frozen on the insect corpse.

"Just pick it up. It's not gonna bite you." It was beyond amusing to me that the great Leah Clearwater was afraid of a little bug. Ha. Wait til the boys hear this!

She didn't answer me and merely stared at the bug, "I don't want to."

"If you're afraid of mosquitoes, why'd you swat it in the first place?"

"I'm not afraid of mosquitoes."

"What? Then… why?" It's official. Girls really are from Venus. I squinted at the limp insect, trying to see what was so special about this one that's got the official bitch of La Push acting this way.

"Don't ask… Jake, could just _please_ get rid of it?" Her pleading tone was confusing. If it were anyone but Leah Clearwater, I would have done it without a second question. But this was Leah and she was acting in a very un-Leah-ish way. The Leah I knew was forever bloodthirsty for deadly vampires. A little bug wouldn't scare her like it would your average chick. Besides, she had plain out stated that she wasn't afraid of them. I had to get to the bottom of this.

"Why can't you?" I said, snorting slightly. When she didn't respond, I full out chortled, "So you _are _a girl after all! It's just a little bug, Lee-lee. And it's dead. Completely harmless."

She didn't say anything. Now I was a little worried. Usually I received threats on my manhood when I called her "Lee-lee." Either she was in a really good mood (which was impossible since it's Leah) or there was something really wrong. "Why are you scared of a bug?" My tone softened a little until the mockery almost disappeared.

She swallowed hard and when she looked up at me, I was stunned to see tears in her eyes. What did I say? "It's not the bug. I'm not scared of little bugs," there was distaste in her tone, but I could also pick up the distress in her monotone. "Why should I be?" There we go. The old Leah we hate but secretly love was back. "It's just that… Jake, me and you… We can live forever if we wanted to. Nothing can take our lives away but ourselves; no human, vampire; nothing. But this mosquito… It's dead. And all I did was touch it… My dad is dead. And all I did was surprise him." Shit. I prefer bitchy Leah.

She quickly rubbed the unshed (thank god) tears from her eyes and laughed, though the sound was bitter, "I'm afraid of death, Jake. There's no difference physically between this mosquito and the one outside in the yard. They have the same organs, same DNA, same blood flowing through their bodies; same everything. Yet this one," she gestured to the insect on the counter, "is dead. And the one outside is alive. And all I did was touch it… Why is it dead? Why is my dad? Why am I not?"

Oh, shit. This was really bad. Unable to meet those watery brown eyes anymore, I ducked my head, staring down at my plate, "I don't know…" I finally managed to mutter. My heart was aching for her. Leah was evidently more screwed up than I thought. I wanted to fix her; do something, anything to make her hurt less, but I was stuck.

Wordlessly, I scooped up the dead bug and put it in the trash. She didn't look at me. I bit my lip as I stopped next to her. "Thank you, Leah," I quietly said.

Her eyes finally flickered to mine. I was relieved to find them dry. "For what?" She curiously asked.

"For sharing that with me," I thought I heard her respond, but couldn't know for sure for I was already out the door...

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